Holden needs a hug

I think The Catcher in the Rye is mainly about Holden's turmoil between wanting life to be as simple as it was when he was a child and his desire to be accepted by society as someone older than his age. This is displayed through Holden's refusal to take responsibilty for his future. Rather than deal with school he wants to run off to the country and live alone. Yet at the same time, Holden is always trying to prove to bar-tenders and women that he is older than he is. In addition, his encounter with the prostitute shows how he wanted to have sex just to fit into his peers' expectation of him. Holden cannot find an equilibrium between his childhood and adulthood which is extremely troubling for him. At one point he considers suicide as an escape, and his drinking is an emotional escape as well. Childhood seems appealing to Holden as he describes the boy singing on the street, "the cars zoomed by, brakes screeched all over the place, his parents paid no attention to him and he kept on walking next to the curb and singing" 115. For Holden, this child's life in a nutshell is all he wants. I think every adolescent can relate to Holden's feelings. For example, during Family Living the kids can have the time of their lives just picking up garbage or running around in circles for ten minutes. Of course everyone wishes they didn't have to study or do home work and that they could be careless again, but most people can accept that they have to grow older, and in turn, more mature.
Throughout the novel I think Holden realizes his place in his family. He obviously feels close to D.B. and Phoebe because he talks about them constantly. When Holden claimed "I felt sorry as hell for my mother and father. Especially my mother, because she still isn't over my brother Allie yet" 155, he showed that he could have sympathy for others. This reveals that Holden does feel regret for failing out of school again because he knows what it will do to his mom. After finally realizing this, I think Holden can take a huge step to actually care about school because he can connect the negative affect him failing has on his family. Also, when Holden said "All the visitors that were visiting the cemetary started running like hell over to their cars. That's what nearly drove me crazy. All the visitors could get in their cars and then go some place nice for dinner-everybody except Allie" 156, he actually opens himself up to admit that Allie's death does still make him extremely upset. I think a reason why Holden is so bitter towards others and claims they're phonies is because he thinks they will never understand what he has been through. He's angry because he lost someone that he loved but by putting these emotions down on paper Holden will be able to handle them. Everything else in the novel that "drove him crazy" was trivial, such as cheap suitcases, the word "grand" and the movies. But the fact that he has mentioned something REAL that can justifiably make someone upset shows that he has matured.
Another thing Holden comes to terms with is that he can never escape his troubles. He comes to this conclusion when he says "That's the whole trouble. You can't ever find a place that's nice and peaceful, because there isn't any. You may think there is, but once you get there, when you're not looking somebody'll sneak up and write "F**k you" right under your nose" (204). There is no place Holden can truly either become a child again or be considered an adult. Holden wants to "catch" every child and save them from adulthood, like he wished someone did to him, but in reality he knows this is not possible. He will never be COMPLETELY peaceful no matter where he is, so instead of running away he should try to adjust to life at home.
Towards the end of the novel, when Holden is with Mr. Antolini, he is given an inspiring message. Holden says he still has the paper which said "The mark of an immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of the mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one" (188). This kind of reminded me when in Macbeth, Macbeth does not want to die the "Roman fool" like some men in Julius Caesar did. A noble man will not kill himself for a cause, but instead live for one. The fact that Holden still has this piece of paper shows that it meant a lot to him and he has found motivation from it. That suggests to the reader that Holden will be able to succeed in his next school and learn from his past.




^^excuse the lengthhhh

ahhhhhhhhhh i cant believe its OVERRRR.....well besides the essay =/

payce and luuuvvv @ndrea x0x0x0x0x0x

The Catcher In The Rye-Bread

Holden's entire perspective on life reveals a lot about his character. He uses sarcasm as a defense mechanism to make up for his own defficiencies. The fact that he has been through so many boarding schools shows that his parents find him so impossible to deal with that they need to send him away. Holden attemps to play off the fact that he has been kicked out of various schools as if it were his own choice, as he said "One of the biggest reasons I left Elkton Hills was because I was surrounded by phonies" 13. In reality, Holden could not find the self-esteem to push himself through school. Holden's lack of self-esteem stems from his self conciousness in his physical appearance, and the fact that he is considered the failure in the family. Because of this, Holden realizes that life is a game and "If you get on the side where all the hot-shots are, thats a game alright...But if you get on the other side, then whats a game about it? Nothing. No game" 8. I think this is Holden's general perspective about everything. He is not the best at anything, so he figures why try if he will always lose. His lack in confidence is also shown when dealing with women.
When Stradlater goes on a date with Jane Gallagher, Holden cannot contain his excitement and interest. At first, Holden just seems interested because he used to be friends with Jane. He repeatedly says he "oughta go down and at least say hello to her" 32, but never actually does. Instead of admitting he was too shy to go to see Jane he just claims he wasn't in the mood. this shows how Holden cannot even admit his true emotions to himself, but always has to make up an excuse so that he doesn't feel inferior to others. Furthermore, later that night when Stradlater returns, Holden takes out his own anger at himself on his roomate. Stradlater didn't ACTAULLY do anything wrong by going out with Jane, but Holden is obviously mad at himself for not having the confidence to say hi to jane, and for succumbing to Stradlater's request to write a paper for him. Rather than looking inward and realizing that the issue lies within himself, Holden acts out aggressively. This aggression was shown before, when Holden's brother Allie died from leukemia.
After Allie died, Holden "slept in the garage...and I broke all the windows with my goddamn fist, just for the hell of it. I even tried to break all of the windows in the station wagon we had that summer, but my hand was already broken and everything by that time" 39. During this rampage Holden claims to have "harldy even know what he was doing" and during the fight with Stradlater he says he can't really remember what happened. This is also just a cover up like when people say they were "soooo drunkkkk" as an excuse for doing embarassing or demeaning things. Also, Holden apparently can't deal with his emotional problems causing him to be aggresive. I think he would be considered a "passive aggressive".
Holden also feels like he is basically on a different level than everyone else, and that he is soo far above society. Once he said "people never listen to you" and another time "people never believe you" 37. These phrases show that Holden catagorizes everyone else as "people" and that they are all against him. He probably feels betrayed by his family, so he views everyone else as a threat. Because he feels threatened, he constantly puts others down by "dissing" them. As he said about Stradlater "Stradlater was putting on his tie infront of the mirror. He spent around half of his goddamn life in front of the mirror" 33. Holden is threatened by Stradlaters' good looks so he calls him vain to feel better about himself.
This is totally out of order, but when Holden talks to Mr. Spencer in the beginning he makes up all these excuses for why he has to leave, not only to Mr. Spencer, but to himself. As he says "But I just couldn't hang around there any longer...and the way he kept missing the bed whenever he chucked something at it, and his sad old bath robe with his chest showing, and that grippy smell of Vicks Nose Drops all over the place" 15. Holden points out all of these details so he can avoid that fact that the reason why he really wants to leave is because he can't face the fact that he has let himself, teachers, and his parents down once again.



Cant wait to keep readdinnngggggg xxx0000000000xxxxx
payyyyyce and LuVvVVVv, @ndrea

CAN SOMEBODY PLEASE PULL ESTHER OUT OF THE JARRR?!?!?!

I feel like this book can be seperated into two parts. Even though Esther's plumet into insanity is gradual, I felt like during her depression she was Esther #2. Prior to her suicidal thoughts, Esther #1 was sarcastic and cynical, but she still seemed to have SOMETHING keeping her going. One thing I found so interesting was how Plath managed to make her suicide seem so rational. I think was a parallel to her own thoughts on suicide which apparently resurfaced later in her life. Someone on the outside of the "bell jar" would see suicide as either cowardly, or just horrifyingly (made up a worddd chyea) tragic. Yet Plath, being inside the bell jar herself can justify suicide as a valid solution to the problems that face her. Speaking of the problems, I saw many distinct causes to Esthers' depression.
One major factor was Esther's indecisiveness. Esther believed that she had to make a choice about her future while she was in college because of the people surrounding her asking her what her plans were. After realizing she didn't have a distinct plan Esther goes further to say "I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest" 77, meaning she wants to do all of these things, but felt that if she chose one path for her life she would miss out on all other oppurtunites surrounding her. This caused her to be so frustrated that Esther concluded doing nothing would just be simpler. Also, Buddy points out that Esther is neurotic because she can't decide between the city and the country; she desires both. Personally, I could relate to this cause of Esthers depression because when people ask me what kind of college I want to go to I end up thinking I want to be in the middle of a city, yet I'd also want a beautiful campus far away from highways and traffic. I think everyone at one time is confused by their future, but unfortunatly Esther cannot handle her problems, so she doesn't deal with them at all.
I think Esther's numbness is a coping mechanism because of the death of her father and how men have treated her in the past. When her dad died, Esther and her mom never properly mourned the loss. By Esther watching this as a young child she learned to bottle her emotions rather than let people see she is upset. Also, when she had high expectations about men (Buddy, Lennys friend) they always let her down. Previosuly she said if you didn't have expectations you could never be let down. Further into her depression she has completely gone numb and claims "I knew I should be greatful...only I couldn't feel a thing...where ever I sat-I would be sitting under the same glass bell jar, stewing in my own sour air" 185. Esther is "IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTIONNNN"--Ron Burgandy, and until she can swqueeze herself out, she will always feel like ending her life would be indefinitly better than doing the same thing every day, if she was only going to die in the end.
Eventually, Esther kind of finds her way out of her depression. I think this comes about because of the shock therapy, and talking to Dr. Nolan. I wish Plath had included more of the conversations between her and her doctor because they were definitly crucial in her healing. I definitly didn't want to play hop-scotch or jump rope with my gal pals when I was done with this book, but there were a lot of parts I enjoyed in the bell jar. Plath should've just written a straight up autobiography BUTTT i guess she wanted to spice some stuff up, and leave a lil out here and there. Shweeeeet NoVeL



x0x0x0x*****~~~~~@ndrea

Jar of Bells Numero Uno

I really like Sylvia Plath's writing style. Everythings kind of sarcastic and so detailed. In every scene the reader gets such an intricate description of Esther's surroundings that I feel like I'm there with her. Esther's underlying depression is slowly seeping through, but so far she seems pretty sane.
A few scenes stood out to me as interesting, the first being when Esther went out one night with Doreen. Doreen seems to feel like she is above everyone else and that she is too cool for the events that the other girls go to. I think Doreen notices that Esther doesn't fit in either so she kind of uses her to go out with and basically make fun of the other girls with. Esther enjoys Doreen's company, revealing Esther's own cynical side. Anywayyyy so when the two girls do go out and Esther sticks by Doreen's side as she gets frisky with Lenny she says "there is something demoralizing about watching two people get more crazy and more crazy about each other, especially when you are the only extra person in the room. It's like watching Paris from an express caboose heading in the opposite direction-every second the city gets smaller and smaller, only you feel it's really you getting smaller and smaller and lonelier and lonelier, rushing away from all those lights and that excitement at about a million miles an hour" 16. I think this quote is such a figurtive look on "third-wheeling" and I felt so sympathetic towards Esther while she was in Lenny's apartment.
That night, Esther "made a decision about Doreen...I decided I would watch her and listen to what she said, but deep down I would have nothing at all to do with her. Deep down, I would be loyal to Betsy and her innocent friends." (22) I think this shows how Esther doesn't know her true identity, and how she always puts on a happy face for everyone but on the inside she is really depressed. The fact that she doesn't know who she is is displayed when she has that meeting and suddenly realizes she has no idea with what she wants to do with her life.
Also, I thought the part about Chemistry was really interesting, especially because Esther is SOOO smart. Her whole scheme to avoid taking Chem was pretty amusing because Mr. Manzi and the Class Dean thought she just had such an appreciation for the subject that she would love to sit and listen even if it didn't count for a grade. But in reality "if my Class Dean had known how scared and depressed I was, and how I seriously contemplated desperate remedies such as getting a doctor's certificate that I was unfit to study chemistry...I'm sure they wouldn't have listened to me for a minute" (36), again showing how Esther can easily appear one way to everyone surrounding her but on the inside shes like I FOOLED YOUUUUUU HA-HA! Theeeeeen when Buddy puts on an act that Esther is sooo much more experienced than him, she gets piiiiiissed, but Esther does the same thing to almost everyone surrounding her. I'm on Esther's side all the way though, that Buddy seems like a real man whore.


x0x0x0x0x @ndrea